Life's Little Bummers

After watching some characters "jump" into the story on television...

 

 

Schatz:  Mom!  It's not working!

First Day of School

Transition (Kindergarden in the US) does not start until Thursday, but in a show of solidarity, school pride, and thinly veiled envy, Schatz got dressed up to take M to school this morning.  "Why is her uniform dirty already?" you may be wondering. Because Schatz has school spirit and is known to get into her FULL SCHOOL UNIFORM to grocery shop, check the mail box, or walk the dog. That's how she rolls.

Slumber Parties, Secrets, and Smoking Cessation

I laid down with Schatz for a few minutes while putting her to bed last night.  She was pretty delighted with this rare treat.

Schatz:  It's like we're having a slumber party!

Me:  Yep.  It's just like a slumber party, but I'm only laying here for a few minutes*.

Schatz:  Let's play slumber party.

Me: Okay.  Do you want to lay here and tell secrets?

Schatz: You first.

Me (pausing to think of something a five year old would find scandalous) : I ate the last slice of pineapple at dinner while you weren't looking.  Do you have any secrets?

Schatz (with the most solemn look on her face):  I caught Daddy sneaking a cigarette** yesterday.


*I actually fell asleep before she did.

**Roger's in the process of quitting.

The Acclimatization of Schatz

Schatz:  Do you think it's cooler, Mom?  I love it when it's nice and cool* like today.

*It is noticable cooler today, but it's still 104°F. (It's been over 110°F for the past few weeks.) 

The Beauty of Crayons

Schatz (in a whisper as she lovingly lines up the brand new crayons):  Oh, Mommy.  Don't let Maura touch them. They are perfect.

The irony is not lost on me.  Schatz is my crayon breaker.  Maura is my rule follower.

The Trouble with Homophones

Schatz: If you could be any aunt....which aunt would you be?

Me:  I'd be my Aunt Becky.

Maura:  I'd be Aunt Gabrielle.

Schatz: I'd be a honey ant, but I'd have a red butt.

Me (catching onto my error):  Why red?  Honey ants have yellow butts.

Schatz: My butt would have Tabasco hot sauce instead of honey.  I'll bet nobody would try to eat my butt then.

All the Purdy Girls

We were walking to Paula's house for lunch.

Me:  You sure are purdy today, Schatz.

Schatz:  What is purdy?

Me: It means pretty.  You look pretty today.

Silence

Me:  Is Maura purdy?

Schatz:  Yes, Maura is purdy.

Me:  Is Miss Paula purdy?

Schatz:  Yes, Miss Paula is purdy.  Do you know who else is purdy?

Me:  Who?

Schatz:  Miss Steffanie was really purdy at our BBQ Party.  (pauses...then draws out this last sentence)  Miss Steffanie sure is purdy.

I see a box...she sees an opportunity

This box was used to move to Australia and to store Christmas presents.  It has been a "drive-in car" while watching Aladdin, a snail shell, and an art project. Today Roger is teaching Schatz the art of building an Acme trap...complete with tropical fish camouflauge...