Schatz: I need your heeeellllp! (At our house, this translates to: Come wipe my bottom.)
I go into the bathroom.
Me: Schatz, you are going to be four soon. Four year olds are big girls and have to wipe their own bottoms.
Schatz: But it's gross.
Me: Yes. It is, but you'll survive it.
Schatz (ever the skeptic): Well, I'm going to need more paper than THAT.
I hand her more toilet paper and step out of the bathroom
Schatz (under her breath): You ALWAYS make me do EVERYTHING!
This Ham is NOT Burned!
10 months ago